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yeah we’re canoodling, keep scrolling
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fully sober and lucid walking down the street googling “is it normal to get a haircut” “am i allowed to get a haircut” “is the guy at the barber shop going to be mad at me when i go in there”
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whoever this woman is maybe my soul mate idk. beverages.
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I wish I was taller. I wish I was a baller. I wish my cat had a phone I would call her.
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beautiful women named excessive heat warning keep messaging me
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if i had absolute power i would be really chill with it actually. i would never corrupt absolutely. i would keep it real niceys. heart
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going to get your tubes tied and when ur done ur doctor shows you an ultrasouns and he’s tied them into a perfect baloon dog :)
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are they… you know …. [up to the audience’s interpretation]
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this is what it’s like trying to piss in peace but u have pets





